Barney

January 31, 2009 - 6:38 PM - Went to see Tramp at the Dog Pound (Animal Shelter for the politically correct) today. He looks lonely. He needs a bath, a walk, a home and a hug - in reverse order. He is three. He really isn't a he anymore, but he doesn't know that for sure. He is a beagle. Beagles are special. Molly was the best beagle ever. She wasn't really a girl either. Tramp (not his real name) has an owner but he or she or they have not come to get him. He has been there in the animal jail since January 17. They should come get him. He is only supposed to have to wait eight days. His jailers, the ones who named him Tramp, can't count. They said to come back on February 2 to see if he might be available for adoption. I hope it is because they think his real family is coming to get him and not just to watch another taxpayer lose productive work time to do business with a bureaucrat.


February 14, 2009 - 6:00 AM - Tramp came home with me on February 2. Tramp was not a good name for him. He became Barney on the ride home. We stopped at Petsmart to get some food and treats. We picked out a stuffed Democrat Donkey to be his first toy. He loves that toy. Won’t chase a ball, but he loves to chase his Democrat. Good boy Barney.

They don’t give you much information about inmates at the Doggie Jail. We could only learn that he was from Anaheim. He was in Doggie Jail because he was a stray. They made him into an electronic beagle during his incarceration. He has chip now forever to be identified in the future. He came with a discount, first for overstaying his welcome; second for getting spayed before being captured by the Doggie Police.

Barney has quickly become part of the family. He seemed very quiet at first. Spent a lot of time sleeping. About the fourth day, Danielle discovered an empty Nyquil tablet on the floor. Oh, oh. It seems she had a cold a couple of weeks earlier – pre-Barney. She dropped a pill on the floor and could not find it. We think Barney did. Toward the end of the week he came to life and started acting like a real Beagle. Poor Barney. Out of jail and into a drug induced stupor. He must of thought he had joined a cult. Imagine the headache he had coming out of that. All is well now. We walk. We talk. We watch his every move.

Welcome to our home Barney.